Among people who identify themselves as Asian/Pacific Islander on the U.S. Census, the number of Asian Female mixed couples compared to Asian Male mixed couples is dramatically skewed. It is more culturally accepted and even portrayed in the media that an Asian woman is a perfectly acceptable life partner for caucasian males. Now does that mean that Asian males should ostracize or denigrate women of their race who choose to date outside? Of course not. Not only do you gripe about the fate that has befallen you, but you blame it on the very people you hope to win the hearts and minds of. That is not a solution, instead embrace it. Culturally, you can date anyone you want. Isn't that liberating, rather than restricting?
What I see most often leading to low morale and self-esteem among Asian men is that they would like to be able to date other races, but feel blocked out. They feel that cultural stereotypes put them at a disadvantage while putting their female counterparts at an advantage. Dating isn't easy. It's a lot of trial and error and a lot of changing one person's mind at a time. And because they "feel" like they can't date outside of their race, they resent the fact that others are dating from what was traditionally "their pool of dating partners." Well, guys you have to snap out of it. In a world of increasing globalization and exposure to other cultures, you have to adapt. And women are not prizes to be won. They are looking for happiness and love, just as we are.
Now, I am not saying to change yourself. But universally, I have found that women are attracted to confident, successful, charismatic men. You can have Asian values and be all of those things, so don't view it as limiting, sometimes you just need to get out of your rut. I have two younger brothers and our dating proclivities are night and day, but we all adhere to similar principles, be true to yourself and put your best foot forward with a smile on your face and an air of self-confidence. Nobody bats 100%.
No comments:
Post a Comment